Return to your rest, O my soul,For the LORD has dealt bountifully with you. Psalm 116:7
I have been working a little too hard lately - not on my kitchen, or on the den (the carpet will speak for that) - I have been working a little too hard lately in communicating with God. I keep looking for the walls to shake and the booming sound of His voice as He bellows forth wisdom and commands. Oh how I have loved these past months, pouring out my heart before God to a depth I have not known before - pouring out my agony, tears, screams, and cries. I have been speaking, He has been listening. And then there are days when I am overwhelmed with His voice, as he shows me things I have never even contemplated. He has been speaking and I have been listening.
But communication takes effort and sometimes I guess I work a little too hard at it. I stare at the blank page of my journal feeling I ought to write something. I dig through my bible reading feeling I ought to hear something. I fear the silence of not hearing God. I fear the silence of having nothing to say. But maybe, rather than fighting to find a conversation topic He simply wants me to climb into His lap and take a nap.
It's 12:58 here, 2 minutes to our daily quiet/nap time. I could read my bible, my devotional book, or my bible study. I could pour words onto the pages of my journal. But I think today I am going to curl up with my mommy blanket in my mommy chair and simply take a nap. As a friend told me today - take a rest Anissa, you deserve it.
Lord, help me not be afraid of the silence. Help me know that the intimate moments of resting in You are just as vital as the deep moments of conversation and contemplation. Lord calm my mind from wrestling with questions You have choosen to not answer. Lord help me to rest.